Quote



"I don't need anger management; people just need to stop irritating me."



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I don't need a personal assistant; I need a personal chef.

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I don't need an encyclopedia; I have Google.

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I don't need a chef; I have a microwave and a cookbook.

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I'm not clumsy; gravity just likes me a little too much.

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I'm not a grammar police officer; I'm a grammar superhero, here to save the world from grammatical errors.

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I don't need a personal chef; I have mastered the art of ordering takeout.

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I don't need a personal chef; I have mastered the art of microwave gourmet.

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I don't need a personal trainer; my dog walks me.

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I don't need a vacation; I need a teleportation device.

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I'm not clumsy; it's just the floor hates me.

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I don't need a hairstylist; I'm having a bad hair decade.

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