Quote



"I'm not addicted to coffee. We're just in a committed relationship."



Unknown



Related Quotes about Funny

I don't need a personal assistant; I have my smartphone.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a prince charming; I need a man who can open pickle jars.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a party animal; I'm a party sloth—slowly enjoying every moment.

Unknown
Funny

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a fitness tracker; my pet keeps me active with constant demands for attention.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a morning person; I'm a morning mess.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a daydreamer; I'm a master of creating my alternate reality.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a klutz; I'm just an expert at rearranging the floor with my feet.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a fitness tracker; my dog ensures I get my daily steps chasing after him.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need anger management; people just need to stop irritating me.

Unknown
Funny

I don't age; I level up.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a personal assistant; I have sticky notes.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a worrywart; I'm a professional over-analyzer.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of uplifting music to boost my mood.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a snob; I just have refined taste buds.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a workaholic; I'm just passionate about avoiding work.

Unknown
Funny

I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something shiny.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a genie; I have Amazon Prime.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a chauffeur; I have a sense of direction that never fails to mislead me.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a hoarder; I'm a collector of memories and things that may be useful someday... maybe.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a personal shopper; I have an unlimited supply of cute online stores.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a morning person; I'm a morning grumpasaurus—growling until I've had my coffee.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of uplifting songs.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a mind reader; I just have excellent guessing skills.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a complainer; I'm just highly skilled in identifying life's absurdities.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a procrastinator; I'm just embracing the fine art of last-minute creativity.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need an alarm clock; my kids jump on me to wake me up.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a night owl; I'm a night adventurer—exploring the depths of the internet and the fridge.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a therapist; I have a Netflix subscription.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a spa day; I need a spa month.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a gym membership; life is my cardio.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of funny videos to uplift my spirits.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a personal assistant; I need a personal chef.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a hypochondriac; I'm just a self-diagnosing medical enthusiast.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of motivational cat videos.

Unknown
Funny

I put the 'pro' in procrastinate.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a drama queen; I'm the whole theater production.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not addicted to coffee. We're just in a committed relationship.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a know-it-all; I just know a lot of useless information.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a daydreamer; I'm a professional escapist.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a life coach; I have a refrigerator magnet with inspirational quotes.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a multitasker; I'm just really good at doing multiple things poorly.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a perfectionist; I just have really high standards that I can never meet.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a personal trainer; I have a membership at a gym I never go to.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a personal assistant; I have sticky notes and a bad memory.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a personal trainer; I have a subscription to a gym I rarely visit.

Unknown
Funny

I always carry a map because I get lost even when I'm walking in my own neighborhood.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a morning person; I'm a morning ninja—silent, moody, and ready to disappear.

Unknown
Funny

I don't need a personal assistant; I have my phone's voice assistant that never understands me.

Unknown
Funny

I'm not a worrywart; I'm a professional overthinker.

Unknown
Funny