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"I don't need a therapist; I have a Netflix subscription."
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I'm not crazy; I'm just mentally hilarious.
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I'm not stubborn; my way is just better.
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I don't need a therapist; I have a Netflix subscription.
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I'm not a thrill-seeker; I'm an accident-waiting-to-happen enthusiast.
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I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of uplifting podcasts.
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I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of motivational podcasts.
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I don't need a driver's license; I have a great sense of direction—just not on roads.
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I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of funny videos to uplift my spirits.
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I don't need a gym membership; life is my cardio.
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I don't need a personal chef; I have a delivery app for all my culinary needs.
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I'm not a hypochondriac; I'm just on intimate terms with WebMD.
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I'm not high-maintenance; I just have high standards... and a few low batteries.
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I'm not short; I'm fun-sized.
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I don't need a chef; I have a talent for turning simple recipes into culinary disasters.
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I'm not indecisive; I just prefer to explore all the options.
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I'm not a scatterbrain; I just have a mind that likes to wander in various directions.
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I don't need a personal chef; I just need someone to follow me around with snacks.
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I'm not a complete idiot; some parts are missing.
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I don't need an encyclopedia; I have Google.
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I'm not a night owl; I'm a night giraffe—elegant and tall, stumbling in the dark.
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I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of feel-good songs.
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I'm not a tech wizard; I just have a special talent for breaking electronic devices.
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I'm not a scatterbrain; I just have an impressive ability to forget important things.
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I'm not a math whiz; I just have a natural ability to calculate how much time I waste.
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I'm not a scatterbrain; I just have a mind that likes to wander... and forget to come back.
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I'm not a control freak; I just know what's best for everyone.
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I'm not a morning person; I'm a morning alien—struggling to adapt to Earth's time zone.
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I don't need a personal trainer; I have mastered the art of avoiding physical activity.
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I don't need a spa day; I need a spa month.
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I don't age; I level up.
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I'm not a grammar enthusiast; I'm a grammar warrior—defending the language against misspellings and typos.
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I'm not a workaholic; I just enjoy being productive in my own unique way—by taking frequent breaks.
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I don't need a therapist; I have friends who give terrible advice.
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I'm not a shopaholic; I'm just a dedicated supporter of the economy.
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I'm not a hypochondriac; I'm just a self-diagnosing medical enthusiast.
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I don't snore; I dream I'm a motorcycle.
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I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of uplifting music to boost my mood.
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I don't need a driver; I have a great sense of direction—it's just usually the wrong one.
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I don't need a life coach; I have an inspirational quote app on my phone.
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I don't need a therapist; I have a collection of funny videos to brighten my day.
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I'm not a shopaholic; I'm just a collector of receipts.
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I'm not a party animal; I'm a party dinosaur—extinct most of the time, but wild when I appear.
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I don't need a chef; I have mastered the art of cereal and microwave meals.
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I'm not a daydreamer; I'm a visionary with a distracted mind.
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I don't need a chef; I have mastered the art of eating out.
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I'm not a morning person; I'm a morning zombie—struggling to function without my daily dose of caffeine.
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I always carry a map because I get lost even when I'm walking in my own neighborhood.
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I don't need a personal assistant; I have sticky notes and a bad memory.
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I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of uplifting podcasts to boost my mood.
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I don't snore; I dream I'm a chainsaw.
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