Quote



"I'm not a night owl; I'm a night giraffe—elegant and tall, stumbling in the dark."



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I'm not late; everyone else is just early.

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I'm not clumsy; gravity just likes me a little too much.

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I'm not a hoarder; I'm a collector of memories and things that may be useful someday... maybe.

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I don't need a personal shopper; I have an online shopping addiction.

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I'm not a picky eater; I'm just highly selective in my culinary adventures.

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I don't need a driver; I have a great sense of direction—it's just usually the wrong one.

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I'm not a perfectionist; I just have really high standards that I can never meet.

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I don't need a personal assistant; I have my phone's voice assistant that never understands me.

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I don't need a therapist; I have my pet to listen to my problems without judgment.

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I'm not a technology addict; I'm just in a committed relationship with my devices.

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I'm not lazy, I'm on energy-saving mode.

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I'm not short; I'm fun-sized.

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I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my keys, my phone, and my temper.

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I don't need a personal assistant; I have sticky notes and a bad memory.

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I don't need a personal assistant; I have my smartphone.

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I don't need a therapist; I have a playlist of feel-good songs.

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