Quote



"I put the 'pro' in procrastinate."



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I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something shiny.

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I'm not a pessimist; I'm an optimistic realist—hoping for the best but prepared for the worst.

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I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

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I don't need a life coach; I have an inspirational quote app on my phone.

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I'm not a mind reader; I just pretend to know what people are thinking.

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I'm not a psychic; I just have a knack for predicting when the pizza delivery will arrive.

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I don't need a personal chef; I have mastered the art of microwave gourmet.

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