Quote



"I'm not a perfectionist; I'm an aspiring perfectionist who never quite gets there."



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I don't need a spa day; I need a spa month.

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I don't make mistakes; I date them.

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I'm not addicted to coffee. We're just in a committed relationship.

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I'm not a worrywart; I'm a professional overthinker.

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I don't need a fitness tracker; my pet ensures I get my daily exercise by constantly demanding attention.

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I don't need a personal trainer; I have a subscription to a gym I rarely visit.

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I'm not a shopaholic; I'm just a collector of receipts.

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I don't need a personal assistant; I have a calendar app to remind me of all the things I forget.

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I don't need a personal trainer; my dog walks me.

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I don't need a motivational speaker; I have my alarm clock.

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I don't need an alarm clock; my kids jump on me to wake me up.

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I don't need a personal assistant; I have sticky notes and a bad memory.

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I'm not a scatterbrain; I'm just embracing the art of organized chaos.

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I'm not a party animal; I'm a party panda—rarely seen in public, but a legend when spotted.

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I don't need a life coach; I have an inspirational quote app on my phone.

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I don't need a chauffeur; I have a habit of getting lost even with GPS.

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I don't need a fashion consultant; I have my own unique style that defies trends.

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I don't need a personal trainer; I have YouTube workout videos that I never actually do.

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I don't need a personal chef; I have mastered the art of takeout.

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I'm not a pessimist; I'm an undercover optimist with realistic expectations.

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I always carry a map because I get lost even when I'm walking in my own neighborhood.

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